Sad News: Kenzo World Does Not Smell Like Shooting Laser Beams Out of Your Fingertips

Remember this fab/ bonkers perfume ad for Kenzo World?


 

Look at her go! Too bad the perfume itself is a total disappointment–after waiting ten damn months, I finally picked up a sample at Sephora the other day, and felt so let down. Kenzo World does NOT smell like the video suggests it smells. Admittedly, I’m not sure what face twitches, high kicks, and finger lasers should smell like, but generic super-sweet girl scent is NOT it. There is nothing interesting about the scent–it’s just a high, bright, strong, saccharine wallop with no complexity and no darkness to counterbalance the sweetness.

Here are some perfumes that smell better.

Masion Martin Margiela Replica Beach Walk. Performs as advertised for sure! Smells coconutty, warm, sunshiny. Lovely bottle. Irritates my skin a bit, so I tend to spritz it onto my camisole and hair, rather than my wrists.

Atelier Cologne Figuier Ardent. As mentioned recently, I love this stuff–I’m on my second travel-sized version. Green and sexy. Once wore this on a romantic liaison with an extremely attractive German man, and he stills texts to say he misses me. I blame the perfume.

L’Artisan Parfumeur Timbuktu. Smells like a sexy rich man’s bug spray, and I mean that as a good thing. I never wear this one on dates, but save it for occasions when I want to feel interesting and powerful. (In retrospect, maybe I should wear it on dates.) I’m running so low on this one… very tempted to repurchase, as this is such a unique scent, and I’m still in love after years of wear. It’s almost finger laser worthy.

Dior Dune. This is my usual date perfume. I think it’s supposed to be beachy, but to me, the dune it evokes is a dune in the desert near an oasis. It’s a hot and spicy dune, rather than an oceanic dune. I still love it, and would whole-heartedly recommend it if you want something feminine and sophisticated and strong. However, I am not thinking of repurchasing it. I have worn it on so many dates, it almost smells like a bad date to me now (oh, modern romance), and I think it’s time for a new vibe.

Finger lasers!

 

Skinsuit Maintenance: Trying Out The Ordinary

This quickie take down of Canadian skincare brand The Ordinary from Fanserviced-B made me chuckle. I’ve been making mental notes about The Ordinary since it was released last summer; mentions pop up fairly often on the Skincare Addiction and Asian Beauty sub-Reddits. Reviews seem mixed: some people love it, and some people don’t. So it seems like The Ordinary products are a crap shoot, which is basically all skin care is anyway. Faceonomics’ longer take on the epistemology, shall we say, of the brand is a good read, too.

I was in the mood for something new last month, so I pulled the trigger on my first order from The Ordinary in the spirit of experimentation. The line is pretty danged inexpensive (although the bottles are itty-bitty!), and I figured that even if things were duds, it would be $30 worth of fun and experimentation.

I ordered the Vitamin C Suspension 23% that Fanserviced-b hates so much she won’t even put it on her face (yikes!), the “Buffet” peptide serum, and the Advanced Retinoid.

So far I feel like I’m getting what I wanted out of my order in terms of a sense of novelty and fun. It was great to order something, have it ship the next day, and then arrive at my place just a few days later–much more fun than a three-month wait for things from South Korea, and zero wondering if my package has been lost. (Canada Post/ Canadian Border Patrol drama has definitely cooled me on ordering from overseas.) And I am digging the medicinal/minimalist look and feel of the packaging. It’s attractive!

The first product I introduced was the retinoid. I’m digging it. I’m on a three-day rotation at the moment: one ‘rest day’, then an AHA day, then a retinoid day. So far no over-exfoliation, and I always feel like I’m counting down towards something exciting while I wait for each retinoid day. Since the rest of my routine is quite stable, I am enjoying having something new, and wondering if it’s going to work. Retinoid is a long-game thing, so I have no idea if this retinoid is really doing anything for me. So far: it’s not breaking me out, and although some people may find the formulation a bit oily/ heavy-feeling, I kind of like the enjoy the sensation of having stuff just slathered on my face. I use about three drops for my whole face.

I have also used the Buffet a few times. I was travelling for about a week, and the 30 ml bottle fit nicely into my toiletry bag. I am not digging this one. The smell is awful! So even if it works, I just don’t really want it on my face. The retinoid has a slight wet sawdust smell to it which isn’t great, but not so bad I don’t want to use the product. Whereas the smell of the Buffet is bad enough to turn me off of the product entirely. I will use it up, but I will not repurchase.

I haven’t used the Vit C yet, as I’ve been waiting to see if the Retinoid melts my face off or something awful, but I am kind of dying to use it. Is it really as bad as Fanserviced-b claims? Can’t wait to find out!

(And–fresh off a bout of soul-searching on the subject of a lipstick purchase, I’ve also decided to get strict with myself on skincare purchases. No more new things or experiments for a while–only repurchasing staple products!)

That Time I Didn’t Buy A Lipstick

So. The other day I watched all of the Makeup Breakup videos on YouTube because I was bored with Netflix and also these ladies are funny and remind me so much of the fun Aussie babes I used to work with on Tasmania.

And of course I fell in love with the lipstick worn by Kat (the brunette) in one of the videos.

Unf.

So I made a little plan to head downtown to the MAC shop and get this lippie, because it just seems like the perfect summer colour, and wouldn’t wearing it just show that I am a fun pretty summer person who has fun and looks pretty while wearing the perfect summer lipstick and doing summer things.

Except that… Before I made it downtown, I read this anti-haul post on Faceonomics, and this anti-haul post on Bad Outfit Great Lipstick, and then poked through the BOGL archives, and I started to think about the emotional roots of my desire for the MAC Darling Clementine lipstick, and I managed to decide against buying it. I am a fun person all the time regardless of what is or isn’t on my lips, you know? And if I’m not feeling fun, it has nothing to do with lipstick or the lack thereof.

Not only did I not buy the MAC lipstick, I was even inspired to clean my bathroom and reorganize my makeup… which… just… Mad props to Bad Outfit Great Lipstick. Not that my bathroom was gross, but I don’t usually dig into that task with that much enthusiasm, shall we say.

So I took my (somewhat dusty, I’ll admit) over-flowing jar of lip products, and divided them into summer colours and winter colours. The winter colours got tucked into the linen closet to await their day, and the summer colours got prettily organized in a little bamboo bin.

Look at all of those summery aren’t-I-a-fun-summer-person-who-has-summer-fun colours! At left: a couple of Sephora lip glosses which I received as a gift. From top to bottom: Jack Black Moisture Therapy Lip Balm SPF 25 in Grapefruit (highly recommended); Nars Satin Lip Pencil in Luxembourg; Nars Satin Lip Pencil in Lodhi; Revlon Colorburst Matte Balm in Unapologetic; Revlon Just Bitten Kissable (ugh that name) Balm Stain in Rendezvous; Revlon Just Bitten Kissable Balm Stain in Sweetheart Valentine.

Lining all that up was so great, I actually [poured myself a gin and then] tidied up my shelf of skincare products, and dug into the linen closet to tidy up the makeup and random junk lurking there. So satisfying! I will admit to throwing out some old products–things that I just never used and were likely long past their use-by dates. And chucking out products–even just deluxe samples from Sephora–really reinforced that I do NOT need to buy more makeup. I just do not get a lot of wear out of this stuff, and already have plenty of fun things that just need to be enjoyed more often.

tl/dr: Don’t buy more shit; just use the nice things you already own!

Note to Self: Next time you need to order skin care stuff…

I’m stoked to try out a few products from The Ordinary that I just received today, but currently the bulk of my skinsuit maintenance products are of the Asian beauty variety. So just gonna leave this helpful thread of suggested stores here, for the next time I need to restock.

Related note–sounds like DHL is shit for Canadians, so don’t choose that option!

Holiday Nails

Last week I saw the Essie 2016 Winter Collection in this gift guide and was instantly OMG GIMME GIMME GIMME. I had to go to two different Shopperses (Kingsgate Mall: no; Main Street @ 17th: yes) but it was worth the extra few blocks’ walk.

They’re all great shades, but for the sake of my poor wallet and over-flowing bin of nail products, I limited myself to “Oh Behave.” In the bottle it looks like a cool-toned dusty Grandma pink shot through with a little bit of gold shimmer, but on my nails it looks much more orange and warm.

So while I do wish it were a bit more pink and a bit cooler, I’m nevertheless loving it. It’s very divorcee-on-a-tropical-island to me, and not at all Christmassy–so perfect nails for celebrating a very merry Atheistspinstermas! I’m going to keep this shade on for the next couple weeks.

Review: Skinfood Jelly Peau in Peach

My recent skinsuit maintenance purchase included one of Skinfood’s Jelly Peau wash off masks. Since this is a new product and there isn’t much information out there, it seemed like a good candidate for a little review. No affiliate links or anything shady here–just me spending my own money on face goo.

Jelly Peau

Jelly Peau

Jelly Peau

I was mostly attracted to the name of this product–there is something about jelly peau that just amuses me. Peau is French for skin… so… jelly skin? I feel like jelly skin isn’t really something I want–I mean, jelly skin would be jiggly, no?–but it sounds funny!

The jelly peau masks–jelly peaux, if you will–come in four flavours: banana for nourishing, grape for moisturizing, peach for vitalizing, and strawberry for hydrating. Since every cell in my body is in need of a vitalizing, I decided to go with the peach.

Jelly Peau

The Peach Jelly Peau smells like peach schnapps–a very synthetic, candy-like scent, as opposed to a natural fruity scent. The texture is like jello that was made with a little too much water–mostly solid but if you scoop a bunch up on your finger and then fart around with your phone trying to take a photo, it will start to drip.

The little capsule contains enough jelly for two or three uses. Note, however, that this type of one-time use product doesn’t have the right kind of preservative system to survive being open for a long period of time. If you opt for multiple uses, cover the product tightly with cling wrap, and use within a day or so. I did two uses, about 24 hours apart.

How to use: cleanse face; open package; smear jelly on face; take a terrifying selfie you will never show anyone; wait ten minutes; rinse off; proceed with the rest of your routine.

The mask is easy to wear. Even with a relatively thick layer of the jelly on my face, it did not drip. Over the ten-minute wait time, the mask dried down to a shiny, slightly sticky film. It was relatively easy to wash off–no scrubbing required.

I decided to try out the jelly peau on a day when I had a headache. I had skipped doing any kind of a morning routine due to the brain-melting pain, so in the evening, my skin was in need of a little extra cleansing. I washed my face with Lee Ji Ham White-P Zyme Enzyme Powder Wash, and then applied the jelly peau mask.

After rinsing off the mask, my skin felt smooth and soft. However, it was slightly drying. I don’t think this is a problem for people with normal to oily skin–you just need to follow up with the hydrating/ moisturizing steps of your routine–but if you have dry skin, this mask probably won’t do you many favours.

I would say that the peach jelly peau mask is good for a day like my headache day. That is, it’s good for a day when you want a little extra cleansing that won’t be too harsh. Compared to other products I use, the effects of the peach jelly peau mask are similar to those of the Holika Holika Gudetama Lazy & Easy peeling gel.

I enjoyed using the jelly peau. At approximately $1.75 (CAD), it’s a nice little light weight item to add to your cart if you are ordering from a site like TesterKorea that does shipping charges by weight bracket. I don’t plan to repurchase this product, however. Considering the effects, I’d prefer to just use my Gudetama peeling gel, and then use my buck seventy-five for a nice sheet mask.

My Latest Skinsuit Maintenance Purchases

While I was typing up yesterday’s skincare-related link post, I was interrupted by the postman delivering some goodies from South Korea. Nice timing, eh?

(It’s always nice timing when the postman rings my buzzer. *wink*)

TesterKorea Order 1
Top row: A’pieu Fresh Mate Mask in Basil; Yuri Pibu Parsley Herb Lotion; Mizon Snail Recovery Gel; Skinfood Shea Butter Perfumed Hand Cream in Pomegranate; Innisfree Cedar Wood Hand Cream. Bottom Row: Skinfood Jelly Peau Mask in Peach; Sulwhasoo Overnight Vitalizing Mask EX.
TesterKorea Order 1
Stack of sheet masks.

This is the first time I ordered from TesterKorea. I desperately wanted the Yuri Pibu Parsley Herb Lotion, and after weighing the price-plus-shipping possibilities of ordering from Glow Recipe, eBay, or TesterKorea, TK seemed the way to go. I paid about CAD$15 in shipping, but TK had the lowest price on the lotion, and I was able to slip enough other fun stuff into the box to make the shipping cost worth it.

Timeline:

  • Order placed August 24;
  • Order shipped August 31;
  • Order delivered September 12.

Three weeks-ish from ordering to delivery is pretty good, I think, for items coming from South Korea. I have heard that TK can sometimes be very slow to ship, so be aware of that if you need to restock in a hurry.

All of these products are new to me, so no reviews–yet!

 

[FYI: no affiliate links or anything shady in this post. Just me spending my own monies on skin stuff.]

Links 14 & 15: On Science-y Claims in Skincare

First: What Lies Beneath the “SCIENCE!” from Kind of Stephen. What I want to know is, where can I buy some of this moon leaf extract?

Second: this great piece from Yoga Nerd MD on “sciencewashing.” Dr. Yoga Nerd kindly posted it to the Asian Beauty subreddit, and the discussion there is interesting (and good fun).

Deciem wasn’t on my skincare radar until the launch of their new line, The Ordinary, a couple of weeks ago. Since the launch, I’ve had a Deciem tab open in my browser but for some reason haven’t felt right pulling the trigger on the products that interest me–which is saying something, considering my usual enthusiasm for throwing money at skincare (and skincaretainment). Yoga Nerd MD’s thoughts on Deciem’s pseudo-scientific marketing language helped me to articulate my uneasiness with the brand. Simply put, I don’t like the way the brand writes about itself. I’ve now closed that Deciem tab, and while it’s possible that wildly glowing reviews may convince me otherwise, I currently have no plans to purchase from any of their lines.

As someone who washed up on the shores of the Asian Beauty subreddit as a refugee from the vapid beauty writing of sites like xoVain, I am deeply appreciative of the thoughtfulness with which many AB fans approach their skincare.